I’m insecure. It’s a tiny sentence, but I haven’t wanted to admit that. Other people have insecurities. I can see them, and I’ve even looked to make sure I wasn’t doing the same thing. But I had an experience which gave me a different perspective. I saw my insecurities: I saw they were changing the way I behaved, the people I talked to, the self-talk I allowed. I noticed a change in my interactions with people in real life, and I gave time to my insecurities about online interactions. Is it worth blogging? Am I offending people? What if no one reads it? Can I even write? I want to share what I feel God’s been teaching me, but what if it’s not really truth?
You may have noticed a gap in my posting (or you may not
have, as my insecurities would like to point out). It’s not because of a lack
of desire or things to say. I’ve been busy, yes, but I’ve been hesitating. I
want to be honest: I have insecurities about blogging.
They’ve been there all along, but I hear God calling me to
do more with blogging – to go deeper, to see it as my ministry, to open up and
allow Him to work. It’s a step out of my comfort zone; it requires walking past
those insecurities.
It’s made me realize something: insecurity is about fear.
Why am I insecure about this? It’s because I’m scared. But God doesn’t dwell in
fear. He’s love, and perfect love casts out fear. (1 John 4:18) And that’s the
answer to my problem, my weakness, my struggle: more love, more God.
~
Everyone has insecurities. They’re a natural part of life in our fallen
world. I’m not suggesting to glorify them, but please, don’t be insecure about your insecurities. If you’re struggling
with something, feeling alone, feeling less-than, scared about what people will
think, about what you’re called to do, about the past or the present or the
future: you’re not alone. You’re beautiful, you’re loved, and you have purpose.
“But now thus saith
the Lord that created thee… Fear not: for I have redeemed thee, I have called
thee by thy name; thou art mine. When thou passest through the waters, I will
be with thee; and through the rivers, they shall not overflow thee: when thou
walkest through the fire, thou shalt not be burned; neither shall the flame
kindle upon thee. For I am the Lord thy God, the Holy One of Israel, thy
Saviour: I gave Egypt for thy ransom, Ethiopia and Seba for thee. Since thou
wast precious in my sight, thou hast been honourable, and I have loved thee…”
Isaiah 43:1-4
Let’s be a little kinder to those around us: we don’t know
what they might be struggling with inside. Let’s be a little more open, because
we’re all in this, and connection is powerful. And when we find ourselves
facing those fears, let’s go to the One who is perfect love, and let His truth
set us free.
Thanks for listening, and I hope to see you more often from
now on. In the meantime, what has been on your heart recently? Is insecurity
something you struggle with? How do you think we can combat it? Tell me what’s going
on for you. I appreciate you all, and you bless me so much.
Jessica xx
