Several times now I've come across the monthly chatterbox link-up on Rachel Heffington's blog. For April though, I decided I wanted to participate and so set to work on this month's theme: travel-by-foot. In her words: "Chatterbox is a monthly event created and hosted by me, designed as a quick dialogue exercise. It doesn't have to be strictly dialogue, as I enjoy good description too, but centering your piece around a conversation is the general idea. I assign a topic (usually one that can be taken any of several ways) and it is your job to write a conversation between your characters, using this prompt. When you've posted your piece on your blog, come back here and leave your link on the link-up below." I got a little involved in the characters and conversations though, so it's more like a short story rather than a 'quick dialogue exercise.' It's not perfect, in fact it seems rather childish now that I re-read it... But, I had fun, and hopefully the old saying proves true - practice makes perfect! And if you have some constructive criticism, please share!
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She stepped onto the platform, suitcase in
hand, another bag clutched under her arm. Everybody else scurried off, the
train puffed away, and Alise was alone. She tip-toed through the
station, and onto the road, while a sigh escaped from her lips. “Why did the
train have to be delayed?” she whispered. The moon hadn't risen yet, and the
light from the train station was not going to last far enough. Alise looked up
at the night sky and pled for safety. She had to walk a little way to get to
her aunty's house; a pleasant stroll in daylight, a fearful stepping in
darkness. She'd only done this once before, and that was with her brother – and
when she was with him, she could be scared of nothing. Her face clouded as the
thought of him came again. It had been four years now since his place of big brother, and closest friend had been vacant.
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| Photo credit |
“It's a bit dark to-night isn't it ma'am?”
the man said, by way of greeting.
“Y-yes, very.”
If the sun had been shining, it would've
revealed Alise's very pale face. Surely only suspicious people brought up
conversations by commenting on how dark it was. Others would've commented on
the pleasant breeze, or glowing evening star.
“You just got off the train I see.”
“Ah... yes. Did you?”
The man chuckled; a friendly little chuckle.
“No Ma'am. The old ford finally decided that enough was enough. She's on the
side back up the road a piece.”
“Oh.” Alise couldn't even banish her own
worry for long enough to express some sympathy for the man's plight.
“The stationmaster isn't any help; I know
the man,” he went on. “So I'm goin' up this way to my mate's place. It's too late
tonight, so I'll call the missus, and stay over. Get the old rattle trap on the
road again tomorrow.”
“Oh,” said Alise again, wondering how far up
this road it was the 'mate's place' and how that corresponded to the couple of
miles to her aunt's house.
“Where are you from?” she ventured.
The man laughed again, a strangely familiar
laugh that made Alise fear the more. “Long story to that one, ma'am. At the
moment we're livin' on a farm 'bout twenty mile back that way.” He jerked his
thumb in the opposite direction to what they were walking. “Bit of a shack
really; the missus would like better. But I've got work there, so we're
staying.”
“Do you have any children?” Alise wondered,
her voice a little less strained than before.
“Yes indeed, ma'am,” the man responded, his
voice echoing the twinkle that would've been in his eyes had she been able to
see them. “One little tacker – he's up walking now. Gettin' into everything
within reach.” The man chuckled, then sobered. “Another one on the way too.
That's where I was today... The missus is having troubles, so I had to get some
pills from the doctor.” He held up the case in his hand. “Not leaving it in the
car,” he said, his chuckle returning, “Never know who's about.”
This last remark brought back the chills to
Alise's spine. Was she really safe walking with this man? She was only just
past halfway to her aunt's house.
“This night air does wonders.” said the man,
breathing deeply as they strode along.
“What is your name?” asked Alise, ignoring
the last remark. At least then if something did happen she would be better
informed.
“You can call me Bruce” he said, a smile in
his voice.
The road fell behind them, one step after
another, until Alise felt constrained to ask, “Where is this place you're
walking to?” They had already passed several houses.
“Just around the next bend.”
Alise wasn't sure where that was in relation
to her aunt's house so she kept quiet, and looked up at the stars. The next
bend came and went, and Alise, caught up in her own thoughts, unwittingly
followed the man when he turned into a gateway, and began unfastening the
latch.
“Oh!” she cried as she bumped into the gate.
“Is this really your friends house?”
“Sure is, ma'am. You headin' here too?”
“Yes, this is my aunty's place. I'm staying
here for a couple of weeks.”
Alise looked up at the stars again as she
waited for the man to get the gate open. They reminded her of her brother and
the nights they'd spent stargazing. It had been their favourite hobby, whiling
away hours naming the bright, glowing planets, and making up their own
constellations. What if she never saw Johnny again? A tear dropped to the
ground at the thought, and Alise's head filled with memories.
“Are you coming Ma'am?”
The voice startled Alise, and she jumped,
before stepping through the open gateway. How could she let herself get so
caught up in her emotions again! “I must stay fully alert,” she chided herself,
“It is not safe yet.”
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| Photo Credit |
They stepped onto the veranda, and a light
appeared. Alise exhaled gratefully: Aunt must be home. She turned to view the
stranger now that there was light to see. He stood there studying her, his face
beaming.
“Do you know me now?” he questioned softly.
Alise stared, her jaw dropped of its own
accord. “Johnny? Johnny!” Her voice rose in pitch and volume. “You told me your
name was Bruce!”
The man, laughing loudly now, swung her around just like old times, despite her squealing protest, adding, “Want to go
stargazing Alli?”
